One of my lovely redheaded longtime friends reminded me of something the other day. The sisterhood. The bond felt by all redheaded women. For those of you that don't have red hair, I'm not sure if you have it too. Do brunettes and blondes connect on a deeper lever? Redheads do. It's more than just sharing a hair color. It's like sharing an experience.
As a kid, red hair made me a target. For insults, for jokes, for teasing. I swear to you... if one more person calls me a firecrotch I'll lose it. Like, hair-pulling catfight style losing it. If you're considering testing that, don't. That is the number one way to lose rank on my hierarchy of acquaintances. I don't know if I fully understand why such an insult lights me up like none other. Maybe because its vulgar? Maybe because it insinuates something negative about the carpet matching the curtains? I don't know. I just know I hate it; and I've heard it far too many times in my life. This is where that redhead bond comes in. I've never met a redhead that didn't absolutely DETEST that nickname. The anger that comes from being called that... we share it. We've all felt it. It's like we're all sitting around the same fury-fueled campfire, roasting our marshmallows of rage.
There's a flipside to this coin though. There's a pride that comes with being a redhead too. You feel special. You feel unique. You feel... well, like a unicorn. Unless you're born with red hair, (as another friend of mine put it) the closest you'll ever be is a horse with a horn taped to your head. I like that feeling. That is truly special. When you meet other redheads, it's almost like you share a private joke in an instant. You realize that there are other people that feel special like you. Kind of like when you see someone in public wearing your team's paraphernalia; "you like what I like!" But for redheads it's more like, "You feel what I feel!"
I must admit I've been missing that feeling this week. I don't feel as special, aside from the occasional remark from people that haven't seen my brown hair yet. My uniqueness is still inside of me though... people just can't see it upon first impression anymore.
I guess that's part of why I'm doing this; I need to learn how to show that I'm rare and unique without playing the "redhead card". I guess I never imagined that hiding my uniqueness would help me discover my uniqueness.
You can never hide your light under a bushel, it's too bright! ;) And I have never heard that icky nickname before, but it's awful. I would throw rocks at anyone that called me that!
ReplyDeleteI know what you mean about the camaraderie, though, I think it's the same thing being a parent. Now I give and receive knowing looks when my kid has a tantrum, is pulling things off store shelves, is refusing to go down the slide. The parent club is wide-reaching, but often pretty friendly, and I like that.
I almost feel that way about being blonde. I know we aren't as rare as redheads, but I still can't make myself dye my hair anything other than red (which doesn't last) or a dark blonde, like it is growing in naturally now. I always said I was afraid to dye it brown or black because it might never grow in blonde again, but I think my deeper fear was losing my identity as a blonde. I always felt like there was something special about blonde hair. But as far as having a bond with other blondes? No, not really....unless I'm in a room full of Asians. ;)
ReplyDeleteAlanna has that bond with blondes when she's over at our house. :)
ReplyDeleteOh Joy, you are a special cookie! Ain't no one and ain't nothin' gonna take that unicorn away from you!
At least you don't have the problem of saying that all Asians look the same tee-hee!